Too Near the Fire Read online

  Leah excused herself, unable to take the bickering any longer. She forced herself to maintain an unreadable expression as she disappeared up to the quiet of the second floor.

  Sitting dejectedly on the edge of her assigned bunk, she exhaled a loud sigh, staring down at the highly polished wooden floor. There wasn’t anything she could do that would end up permanently mending the broken peace. On one hand she was indebted to Gil for his fairness in the situation. But on the other, his staunch defense of her was only going to fan the flames of dissension. She couldn’t win and it was placing Gil in a difficult position with Saxon. She got up and paced the length of the room, unable to contain the feeling of helplessness within her.

  If she had been a man, no one would have raised an eyebrow, much less a stink. Her green eyes darkened with pain and confusion. Was the gulf between sexes too great to bridge? She recognized that Gil was doing all he could to help her. But she worried that the situation would create a rift between Gil and his fire fighters. Might they all lash out at Gil, making the pressure on him so great that he would quit? She had seen one of her instructors down at the academy unmercifully teased because he took her under his wing and defended her. Time, she told herself desperately, time would heal the wounds that she had ripped into the fabric of the department simply by being there.

  * * *

  Leah was anxious to leave the station the next morning. The floors had been swept and mopped, the engines polished, and all the gear cleaned. It had been a busy night. They were called out twice, once for a smoke investigation, and the other time for a car fire. Chief Anders finally dismissed them.

  “Don’t forget,” Gil reminded all of them, “we’ll be off duty for the picnic that’s scheduled for August 28th. Have your wives bring a casserole or a dessert.”

  “How about some of my spaghetti and meatballs?” Apache piped up, grinning broadly.

  “Let your wife do the cooking,” Wilson begged, raising his hand in farewell.

  Leah slipped out the side door and walked to her car. It was already warming up even though it was only eight in the morning. Hearing someone come up behind her, she turned. It was Gil.

  “Is the offer still good?” he called, slowing up as he approached her.

  She tilted her head, mystified. “On what?”

  He ran his strong fingers through his dark hair. “Either you’re sending me a message to forget it or you’ve got your mind on something else,” he commented.

  She stared up at him, lips parted as she searched her mind for what he was referring to. “Oh!” she gasped. Touching her brow she murmured, “I’m sorry, Gil…no…it’s the latter. I’ve just got a lot on my mind. I’d love to have you over for dinner soon.”

  He broke into a teasing smile, his blue eyes brimming with deviltry. “Name the day and time and I’ll bring the wine.”

  “How about tomorrow evening, say seven?”

  “Sounds good.” He reached out and gripped her shoulder. “Get some sleep, you’ve got rings under your eyes. I’ll see you soon.”

  * * *

  A sense of happy expectation swirled around her as she gave the apartment one last critical survey. The last of the boxes had been unpacked over a month ago and everything was finally put away. The living room was comfortable, graced with pale yellow walls and heavy white drapes at the picture window. Two Boston ferns hung at strategic points, giving the place a look of freshness. She folded the orange and beige afghan one more time and hung it on the back of the rust-colored sofa.

  While preparing the meal of seafood Newburg and the pastry shells that went along with it, Leah tried to sort out her emotional reactions to Gil Gerard. Every time she thought of his coming over for dinner, her pulse beat more strongly. She felt fear and a strange sense of elation at the same time. What did he want from her? A stolen moment in bed? An affair? He liked her, that was obvious. And it was equally obvious that she liked him…but where would it take them?

  She stirred the seafood into the smooth sherry sauce and added a squeeze of fresh lemon. Despite her worries, she was determined to have a good time tonight. A knock at the front door interrupted her thoughts. She picked up a towel and walked through the living room. Gil stood there, looking in through the screen door, a bottle of wine tucked under one arm.

  “Just in time,” she said, opening the screen. “Come on in.”

  “Anyone ever tell you how beautiful you look in green?” he asked, handing her the chilled white wine. He gave her a slow appraising glance. His eyes met her curious gaze. “What did you do to your hair?”

  Leah blushed slightly and turned back to the kitchen. “I put it up. I think I’m going to have to cut it because of that one place where I burned off such a huge strand of it.”

  Gil groaned, resting lazily against the sink. “Give me a break, Leah!”

  She smiled, stirring the contents of the pan. “I know, you love long hair, right?”

  Gil nodded his head. “I’d consider it a personal loss if you cut your hair.”

  “Mmm, would you stop flattering me? Erect that strong, silent male facade to punish me?” she teased.

  She felt him come up behind her and she stiffened. His hands rested lightly on her shoulders and her heart began to pound strongly. Suddenly all the teasing banter fled and she was wildly aware of his powerful maleness as never before. He leaned down, his mouth near her ear. “I was wondering what it took to settle you down,” he whispered huskily. “You’re too smart for your own good, lady. You have all the witty answers and great retorts to keep a man from finding the real Leah Stevenson.”

  Leah trembled inwardly. His voice was a roughened whisper that evoked powerful reactions from her body. She felt his fingers slide down her arms and she drew in a deep, unsteady breath. His caress…God, it was so sure, so…experienced. Delicious shocks traveled through her at his touch and she felt him pulling her back against his hard, masculine body.

  “I’ve been thinking a lot about you,” he admitted. “How you successfully evade me.”

  She swallowed hard, a pulse leaping at the base of her slender throat. “It hasn’t been on purpose,” she said, her voice sounding breathless and far away.

  “No, I didn’t take it as a personal insult.” He forced her to turn around as he took the wooden spoon from her hand and placed it on the stove. His eyes were dark and turbulent as he cupped her face within his callused, strong fingers. “Whether you like it or not, I’m going to find the real you beneath all those defense mechanisms, you understand?”

  Her dark lashes swept downward and she closed her eyes, unable to deal with the ache growing within her body. Her heart was beating like a frightened bird in her chest and she suddenly opened her eyes, trying to break contact with his mesmerizing gaze. “No…” she protested softly, “don’t…”

  His hands moved up to her shoulders. “Don’t be frightened,” he murmured, searching her face minutely. He gave her a small shake. “I’m just serving warning that after working with you for two months I want a fair chance to know the real you, Leah. Not the embattled, beleaguered woman fighting to carve a niche in a male-dominated career.” His hands slid from her shoulders but she remained painfully close to him, unable to say anything. He must have sensed how shaken she was because he moved away and began searching in the drawers until he found a corkscrew to open the wine.

  Uncertain how to react, she grabbed up the spoon and resumed stirring the seafood mixture. Gil poured them each a glass of wine and handed one to her.

  “Let’s drink to exploration,” he said, clinking his glass against her own. His eyes seemed to probe hers.

  “No. To moderation.”

  He gave her a slight smile, his generous mouth curving upward. “All right, moderate exploration,” he amended and took a sip.

  Leah watched him warily as she took a sip of the light, dry wine. Completely unhinged by the sudden intimacy of his gaze, she took another huge gulp. No man had ever penetrated her defense systems as easily as
he had just done. That made him all the more dangerous to her.

  Gil put the wine in the refrigerator and resumed the conversation, trying to lighten her mood. “You are coming to the picnic on Sunday, aren’t you?”

  “I—haven’t decided yet.”

  “It would be a real gaffe if you didn’t show up, you know.”

  Anger tinged her voice. “Yes, and if I go all I’ll get are stares from the wives and ugly comments from Duke. Do you think I find that comfortable to deal with?”

  Gil watched her closely. “No one would. But everyone is bringing a date or a spouse to the picnic. You don’t have to go alone.”

  She gave him a tight smile. “That’s just fine. I only moved here two months ago and I don’t know anyone.”

  “You know me.”

  Her eyes widened. “I thought I did. All of a sudden you go from humorous, teasing Gil Gerard to—to…”

  “What?”

  She pulled out the warmed pastry shells and quickly filled them with the seafood Newburg. “Who knows what,” she admitted in an exasperated tone.

  He laughed quietly. “Well, at least I’m not getting cute little comebacks from you. I’ll settle for your being undecided.”

  Leah glared up at him as she placed the main course on the table. When she came back she put both hands on her hips, fearlessly meeting his blue eyes. “I hope for your sake you aren’t doing this just for the fun of it, Gil. I’ve had men take me on because I was a challenge to them. Some men like a strong woman. Only they like the challenge of making her submit and then they get up and walk away. Do you know how much that hurts when it happens?” she demanded, her voice rising in anger. “I fell for that game twice and I promised myself never again.”

  “So you think I’m one of them?” he asked, compressing his mouth.

  “I don’t know!” she fumed.

  He took her arm and led her back to the table. “Come on, our meal will get cold if we stand around shouting at each other. You’ve worked too long and hard on this food to waste it.”

  He brought over the wine and pulled out the chair for her. Leah sat down, raging inwardly. The whole evening was turning out wrong! She looked over at Gil, who was enjoying the food with obvious relish. Was she overreacting? She forced herself to eat, but she didn’t really taste anything.

  After the meal they sat in the living room with their coffee, Leah on the couch and he in the overstuffed chair opposite her. Some of her anger had abated, but she was still upset. Cautiously, she looked up and realized he was watching her again with that same intense gaze.

  “Since you’re a lady who likes new challenges, let’s do something unique with our evening,” he suggested easily, rising. “It’s only seven and it won’t get dark until nine-thirty. Let’s go riding for an hour.”

  Leah’s eyes widened. “At your farm?”

  He smiled, holding out his hand. “Are you up to the challenge of it?”

  She hesitated, completely taken off guard. “Well—”

  “Come on,” he urged. “If I leave now you’ll just sit here and brood over my various blunders. I’d like to put that smile back in your eyes before the night’s over with. How about it?”

  How could she say no when he put it that way? She found herself liking his method of apologizing. “I’m not a very good rider—”

  “I’ll show you the basics. Better change clothes, though. A workday blouse and jeans would be more in order.”

  Five

  She found herself curious about his lifestyle. Since their initial conversation months ago, she had wanted to know more about him on a personal level. Up until now, the appropriate opportunity hadn’t arisen. “You said you lived in the city before, Gil. Do you miss it at all?”

  He shook his head. “No.” He gave her a sidelong glance. “These last three years since Jenny’s death, I’ve explored some alternative ways of living.”

  “And you’re a country boy at heart?”

  He grinned. “I don’t want to bore you with my life history but—”

  “Somehow,” Leah pointed out dryly, “I don’t think your life history would be boring in any shape or form. Try me.”

  “Born and raised in Ohio. Actually I lived in Dayton up until three years ago when I hired on with Baybridge as a fire fighter.”

  “And what did you do before becoming a paid fireman?”

  “Worked mostly in the construction field. I have a degree in business management from Ohio State and I dallied around with it for a number of years.”

  “But you were never really satisfied?” she prodded, unable to visualize him doing anything else but fire fighting.

  “No, not really. I didn’t find it challenging enough. I had belonged to a volunteer fire department for a long time, and I felt it was time to put up or shut up, so I went to night school and got an associate degree in fire science.” He glanced at her, smiling. “The rest is history.”

  She leaned back against the seat, lips pursed in thought. “So you gained your insight about people from studying psychology.”

  “Some of it. Mostly from field experience,” he assured her.

  “Well, you’ve handled my coming into the department beautifully so far. I cringe every time one of those guys gives you a hard time, though,” she admitted ruefully.

  “Like I told you before, Leah, I’ll back you to the hilt. You do a good job and I see no reason to leave you high and dry so they can pick you apart. I saw that happen down at the volunteer department I was at, and I swore if I were ever in a position to stop it from happening again, I would.”

  “What do you mean?” she asked, frowning.

  “We had a woman volunteer at our station. Lucy lasted one year and then quit.”

  “Why?”

  “The gossip, lack of support from the men. They treated her like she wasn’t there, just a ghost. I give her credit, she hung in there a long time, but eventually she couldn’t take it. It was a real shame because Lucy was a great fire fighter. Not just good, but great. Damn, she had good instincts out at a fire scene. I really hated to see her leave but I didn’t blame her.”

  “I know how she feels.”

  “Someday, maybe all that will change.”

  He pulled the truck into a long dirt driveway. A two-story white farmhouse surrounded by elms and maples was visible in the distance. Leah saw two beautiful-looking horses standing contentedly near the barn as Gil pulled up to the house. He put the truck in the garage and shut it off. “Well, welcome to my humble home.”

  She looked around, stunned by the beauty of the farm. “It’s lovely,” she breathed, “and so calm and peaceful out here.”

  She hadn’t realized how much she would feel the peace. After saddling the two horses and helping her to mount, Gil took her through a field of clover toward a stand of birch, oak, and ash. Just the pleasant clip-clop of the hoofs against the dry ground, the singing of the birds above them, and his presence lulled her into a state of complete relaxation. He rode at her side, their legs occasionally touching when the path narrowed. The grove gave way to another field and they rode along the edge of it.

  “Given any further thought to that picnic?” he asked, breaking the companionable silence.

  “Please, I’m trying not to think of it.”

  “You’re welcome to come with me.”

  She gave him a long stare. “Can you imagine what the gossip will be if we show up at a social function together?”

  Gil raised one eyebrow. “Nothing in departmental or union rules that says I can’t escort a fellow fire fighter.” He grew serious and reached out, claiming her hand. “I don’t give a damn what anyone in that department says. I know that picnic will be tough for you and I’d like to try to act as a buffer.”

  A pleasurable tingle fled up her arm and she suddenly felt safe. “Why are you sticking your neck out for me, Gil? Let’s not fool ourselves, we both know that if word gets back that we’re seeing each other—”

  “Stop worrying a
bout the future,” he soothed, squeezing her hand. “You have a bad habit of worrying too much.”

  “And I suppose you don’t worry at all?”

  “Only when trouble stares me in the face. My basic philosophy is to worry only about that which you can change. What you can’t, you release. Simple as that.”

  She reluctantly pulled her hand free. He reined his horse to a halt and dismounted. Leah did the same. Gil came up to her, then stood motionless at her side.

  “What does it take to stop you from running, Leah?” he demanded quietly.

  “I’ve never run from a thing!” she snapped.

  He gave her a tight smile. “Does my touching you make you uncomfortable?”

  Averting her gaze, she mumbled, “No.” She heard him sigh and she looked back up. He shifted to one leg, his hand resting on his slim hip.

  “You’re like that gray mare.” He reached out to caress her cheek. “All you need is some gentle handling….”

  She met his turbulent gaze, her heart pounding in her throat. Words were useless between them.

  He reached out and gripped her shoulders firmly. “Don’t fight me,” he murmured, leaning down.

  Leah inhaled sharply, stunned by his sudden, unexpected move. A bolt of lightning roared uncontrollably through her body as his mouth conquered her lips, parting them, demanding entrance. Her pulse leaped crazily. His fingers tightened against her tender flesh, his mouth growing more gentle and coaxing against hers. A new, delicious feeling soared through her traitorous body as his tongue stroked the inner recesses of her mouth. She melted into his awaiting arms. A small moan came from deep within her as his mouth urged her to participate, to become a willing partner in the kiss. His roughened fingers caressed her jaw, trailing down the expanse of her neck. Seconds became a sweet eternity as she returned the smoldering passion of his masterful kiss. His breath was warm and moist against her face when he finally pulled away from her.

  Leah trembled violently within his arms, staring into his passion-darkened eyes. Her breath came in gasps; her heart thundered against her breast as she lost herself within his hypnotic gaze. “I want the right to know you, Leah,” he whispered thickly.